Boys Will Be...?

Let me be the first to say that I am completely averse to gender stereotyping and double standards based on whether or not a child has a Y chromosome.

Unfortunately, some people are not. Unfortunately, some people like to buy into the "boys will be boys" mentality and raise their children with different sets of manners and values, based on their genders.
Now, don't get me wrong. I understand that there are differences. Lizards and snails and puppy dog tails and all that. I get it.

But, I am tired of seeing little boys at the park run over my child and other children half their size, trampling any little girl who gets in their way, yelling unkind and hurtful words at smaller children just because they can. It's not just at the park, but that's where I see a lot of it. They are rude and disrespectful to adults, too, without apology. I've seen boys as old as 8 or 9 step on and shove my 2-year-old out of the way as she was about to come down the slide because they wanted to go first.

What infuriates me is that their moms watch this behavior happen and don't say a word. They do, however, correct their little girls for yelling too loudly or not waiting their turn. Oh, sure, I've seen one or two moms let their daughters be rude without saying anything, but it's usually the boys who are allowed to act like cavemen with no consequenses.

I know for a fact that they don't behave that way just because they're boys. I've seen too many polite, well-behaved boys who know the difference between right and wrong, to believe that all boys act like the devil's spawn. Were those boys perfect? No. Did they have a lot of energy to burn? Of course. But, they knew better than to treat others - particularly adults - badly. The male child is not born completely devoid of the ability to understand good behavior.
So, what's the difference?
How do we raise boys who don't stomp on toddlers or shove past adults, even when they're on the playground? How do we teach them to say, "excuse me," when they want someone to move, or to hold the door for someone pushing a stroller instead of charging through the door and letting it close? How do we make sure that babysitters want to come back? Or, better yet, how do we do all of that when they are influenced by so many other kids whose parents have the, "boys will be boys" attitude and let them run wild?

If you have awesome boys (and you know who you are), I'd love any advice you can share.